a new recipe

I just made these cookies. They use no sugar and no flour. I used grain sweetened chocolate chips (Did you even know there was such a thing? Me either!). It was also my first time using coconut oil. Very fun and yummy, if you don't mind the taste of bananas in your cookies. Which I don't.

Perfection is not the goal

As opposed to my first attempt, my goal is not to achieve perfection. I do not think that I will make it to May having not consumed one ounce of white sugar/flour. Seems rather unreasonable to me. So on days like today where I didn't pack enough food the day after a speed workout, I can neither confirm or deny that I may have eaten the only thing available to me (a Betos bean burrito and some croissant chicken salad sandwiches). My fault. Now I remember how kicking up my miles makes me hungrier and that if I hope to eliminate these (what I consider) harmful substances from my diet, I'd better pack more yummy, healthy food throughout the day. My quest continues.

Overall, today was good. I didn't feel all that cute (me no likey early morning meetings), but after my big "f*** off world; I live my life!" epiphany on Monday, I have felt worlds and worlds better. Plus I got to have dinner with a great friend at one of my favorite places in the city tonight. Cowabunga, dudes.

This is what I want.

http://www.cnn.com/2009/SHOWBIZ/Music/11/13/morissette.eating.disorder/

I've been pissed all day.

I woke up in a bad mood. But I don't think it had anything to do with the sugar thing. I didn't run all weekend. This guy I'm dating is an idiot. The 7th graders are essentially the equivalent to monkeys. And faculty meeting wouldn't end.

So I came home and ran and now I'm gonna make some yummy stew and stop caring about everything I can't effing control. Seriously.

I'm awesome. I'm hot. Screw the rest.

You all probably stopped reading.

So I've been eating pretty much whatever I want. And I haven't felt as energetic and great as I did while I was off sugar.

I've decided to run another marathon. It's in May. And as part of my training, I wanna see if being off sugar and white flour makes a difference in speed and energy long term. I also wanna see if I have less joint pain without it. So I'm starting again. And this time until May.

I may make an exception for Thanksgiving and Christmas Day.

Here we go. Again. The first installment taught me I was capable...let's see if I can make this a habit.

Um, ok.

Today when I was at Liberty Heights picking up my weekly CSA, I saw these deep, dark brownies made with guittard chocolate. I thought, "Might as well start right there."

So for dinner I ate pasta (white flour) and for dessert I had a brownie (the first bit of sugar I've had in a month).

Right now, I feel pretty sick. I really do need to listen to that, I think.

I did it.

I'm sorry I haven't posted in the past 10 days. Here's the summary: I successfully went 30 days without sugar. No chocolate. No desserts. I even avoided ketchup. I did, as I told you in the last post, cave a bit on the white flour end of things. Last Wednesday was back to school night and what food was provided? Pizza. And I knew I needed something to eat. And you know what I think? I think eating white flour made the sugar cravings come back. It could partly just be hormonal or whatever, but I swear that after I started eating white flour periodically that I wanted sugar and junk food again. So the last week or so I haven't felt as awesome as I was.

But I did it. I went a month with no sugar. And it was awesome. I felt awesome (for a couple weeks anyway). I felt in control. It simplified choices. It made it easy to say no to things I would have compelled to eat. It made me more aware of the ABUNDANCE of sugar around me. And I realized some of my food patterns (like not preparing ahead of time) that make eating healthy difficult.

I'm really glad I did this. Now what? I still haven't eaten sugar even though my experiment technically ended yesterday. I've been eating some crappy food lately(i.e. bean burritos, arbys. Who knew you could eat so crappy while still avoiding sugar?) and I want to clean it up before I get off the wagon. Plus, I'm afraid I'll go back to my old habits. So I need to come up with a plan. And the perfect dessert to break my celibacy with. I'm thinking something chocolate. Or perhaps chocolate chippy.

What should my next experiment be?